devotionals · Life & Faith

don’t make me move

Here we are again. Again. We moved again. I never thought I would make that statement, type or have to deal with it but here we are. We are currently in Colorado. From the low elevation of North Carolina to the mile high city, here we go. I’d like to say that this a wonderful change and everything is perfect but I would be a liar. Yes, let me state that this is a good change and will carry with it some amazingly positive repercussions for our family. But right now? Right now it is hard. It is hard to remember which street to turn on to take the kids to school sometimes, I still have to gps to get to the grocery store, and I sometimes forget that I don’t get to hop out of the car with Maddy and teach my ESL classes at her middle school. We are relearning and redoing everything, AGAIN. Some days I am so overwhelmed with the beauty that is Colorado, it feels like a vacation where I just get to hike and explore. But then car pickup time comes again and I’m gps-ing school locations. I am fixing meals and helping with homework. There is some normalcy in some of our routines; it will take time to get back to “normal”.

I think this season has made us all realize that we are so vulnerable and change can do several things to us. It can make us so very sad, clinging to our pasts. It can make us bitter and angry, finding fault at every turn. It can make us so exhausted that we only want to check out and not feel anything. If I am honest, I felt all of these emotions in the past year.

We have had so much change in such a short time. It is not comfortable and it is not easy. I have moments of silent opposition but mostly, I have just plowed ahead. So here I am, 2 states later in only a year. We covered these decisions in prayer but it’s easy to roll your eyes and think, what the heck is going on? (Believe me, I have.) So, I have really been asking God, what do you want from me? In this season, in this time, who am I? What am I supposed to be doing? What do you have for my family?

Just like He always does, God answered me loud and clear. “Annalee-I want the same for you as I ever have. I have plans to give you a future and a hope. You just need to open your hands and release your plans and receive mine. You are chosen, loved ,redeemed, a child of light, a disciple maker, My hands and feet to the earth. I care more about your family than you do. I have plans to prosper them. It may not look like what you thought but I promise it will be good. You will see my hand in it all. Your location has changed but my plans have not.”

So there it is. I am clinging to God and His promises for me and my family. My brain is foggy, my body is weary but God is not. His Holy Spirit lives in me and will continue to remind me that it’s not really all about me anyways, it never has been, it never will be.

So as we slowly acclimate to life here, try find our place, our community, our people, I am reminded that God has covered us in prior seasons with so many friends and loved ones. Those same people who are praying for us and reach out to us constantly. God knew we would need their encouragement in this season. God knew we would need someone to come “alongside” us to hold our hands up in the daily battle.

It will be easier with time, I know this. In the meantime, I am learning to choose joy over bitterness, anger, or just checking out completely. We are here for a reason. I am circling my people and this place in prayer. I’m not wasting this time, this margin He has given me. Just one request God-please don’t make me move again.

Lord, You have increased our boundary lines. I am circling them in prayer. Bring us community and people. Open our eyes to the people that need us here. Help us to be true neighbors and friends to live on mission for you. Be the lifter of our heads, hands and hearts. Amen

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