We all write for different reasons but I’d have to say the main reason is to tell a story. Whether it’s our own or one dear to our hearts, we feel our writing will carry that story past ourselves, to others, keeping it alive.
When we write, we pass on what we know, how we live, what we hold near to our hearts. When we write, we leave our voice, our mark, our small thumbprint on the world.
When we write we leave the written word as our legacy for others to gain insight into our worlds or others’ lives. When we write, it’s like a letter waiting to be opened, for just the right person.
I write for others to know me, when I can’t articulate it all in words. I write so others will know the people I have loved, the places I’ve lived, and the worlds inside of my head. In most arenas, I don’t have a platform. I talk and others don’t listen. I’m spoken over or ignored. It used to be something that hurt. Now it just solidifies the fact that writing gives me the platform I would never otherwise have had to share my words with the world.
I think of people I’ve lost when I think of treasures lost. Lives that have touched my own in some way.
Along those lines, I think of time. Some of those precious people gave me the treasure of their time.
I think about time as a treasure lost, how I often long to spend just another minute talking to a loved that has passed on or I wish I had been more present in a conversation with someone in which we never knew would be the last. The treasure of time can often be lost when I don’t reflect and revel in the present, taking it in and pausing. Rather I move quickly to that next thing.
While time is a treasure, it is the most valuable of riches that we spend too freely, take for granted, can never get back, and never have enough.
I’m starting off the new year with a writing challenge to keep me in the habit and to hopefully engage with fellow writers. The first prompt is to write about your earliest memory.
I can remember the brown tile floor, maybe it was more of a laminate. I watched her load and unload the washer and dryer as the day took on the familiar routines of housework after my big sister went to school.
Maybe I was around three or four, I don’t really know. The washer and dryer sat in the back room of our old house, it was like a long sun room and I actually remember the light shifting in as my mom worked. I think she gave me wash cloths to fold since I wanted to help her.
I remember thinking how pretty my mom was and how one day I would run my house just like her. I’m sure that’s not exactly what my three year old mind thought, but close.
After a little while, mom would have a cup of coffee. I can’t remember if she still smoked then. I barely remember that. The white mug she would pour her coffee in looked so grownup and elegant. I always asked her to try some coffee and mom always made me her version of coffee-sugar coffee.
I would sit on a high back stool near my mom, drinking the mostly sugar and milk with a splash of coffee, thinking that life couldn’t get better.
The familiarity of the laundry routine was comforting. The smells of the detergent, the softness of the clothes, the warmth of the light in the room. It was a simple moment made special and engrained in my mind-sharing coffee with my mom on a regular day, just us.
I love to look back at old journals. I looked back at an entry this morning that I had written a year ago to the day. It was called reflections 2021. I had focused on the word Jireh which means “God will provide” or “Yahweh”. Looking back at 2021 and into 2022, Jireh was the word God had given me to lean on, to focus on in a transitional period of life.
I had written about how God provided for Abraham in Genesis 22. Got tested Abraham’s faith and obedience. Here are a few things that I learned from that passage:
1. Abraham OBEYED even if God asked him to do something he did not want to do and did not understand. V. 3
2. Abraham DECLARED that God would provide. He had no idea how, he may have had to sacrifice Isaac but he knew God was faithful. V. 8
3. God spoke and Abraham STOPPED and LISTENED. V. 11
4. Abraham obeyed AGAIN and God PROVIDED the ram for the sacrifice. V. 11-13 (Abraham didn’t try to find another way. He didn’t try to be self sufficient here. That’s a tough one.)
5. Abraham REFLECTS on what just happened and named the place in remembrance of God‘s provision. “God Will Provide.” V. 14
So what if God didn’t provide the ram and Abraham had to kill his son? Would God still be good? Would God still be our Jireh, our provider? Yes.
It doesn’t always make sense. I can’t imagine the tears that trickled down Abraham’s face as he walked ahead of Isaac, trying to hide them from his little boy. I can’t imagine how his heart beat that morning as he gathered the supplies for the sacrifice. I can’t imagine the doubts and questions that crossed his mind. I wonder how sick he felt as he realized he would soon sacrifice his own flesh and blood. Yet, Abraham obeyed. He believed in Yahweh’s provision beyond human understanding.
2022 has been a year where I have clung to the provisions of God. Yahweh has provided time and time again. He didn’t ask me to sacrifice my flesh and blood but He has asked me to do things I didn’t want to or fully understand. He has asked me to let go of a lot of things and cling to Him. I have been angry, frustrated, scared, unknowing and even blatantly disobedient, yet He has always provided.
So what do you need? I think the end of every year is a good time reflect. If we don’t make time to reflect, we don’t learn from our past, we don’t gain insight for our future decisions.
So what do you need? Again. Think about that question. As a Christ follower, I know, like Abraham, that God will provide my needs. It may be messy and strange and make no sense but He is always Jireh. No need to help His sufficient, all knowing hand, He’s got you. He knows what you need.
A front porch view 